"Do yourself a favor and get your cone topped off with a double shot of condensed milk."
"Did you know that gel mani/pedis protect your nails from the sand and salt water? Try it before your next beach holiday. And thank me afterward..."
"Thirsty for something, dare I say refined, in this collegiate hood? Head here for a fab glass of Montepulciano and spot-on service."
"The rugelach and olive stick WILL change your life. Period."
"Grossest. Bathrooms. EVER. Seriously, how much tuition does it take to get a good scrub?"
"Some of the tastiest *HANDMADE* pork/chive dumplings in town"