Michael Grela

"Somebody help me"

"People are eating take out Chinese and carrying sleeping bags. Love a good hostel."

"It smells like bacon and lube in this place! Where's the bartender and why do they only serve sparkling pinot?!"

"Put a quarter in the taller ones slot for a cheap show. But make time to run to the clinic afterward -- she's been around the block more than a few times."

"Get in line if you want to see the oldest loving prostitute. But be careful -- she has toenails like spikes and breath like a dragon. The locals say she's the cheapest in town though. She goes by Chaz"

"Charles always has a ice cold Activia for guests!"