"Wifi couldn't be any worse"
"Get the frozen margarita and strawberry daiquiri mixed if you want to be wasted for $5"
"Our neighbors are hardcore. I wish we were friends with them they party like rockstars.... Every night"
"Bitches not welcome! Sorry c ya!"
"If you have to pee hope you make it to the upstairs bathroom in time! Downstairs is out of service!"
"Is that a closet? Oh wait no that's my room."