Kayakfishingfever.com

"Fact: if your name is like Bill Smith Jr They refuse to give you a Sr Discount. Please don't name your boys or girls Jr, after their fathers. It deprives them of discounted food later in life."

"I don't enjoy the FOV test. But the good news is I only have to do it every six months... For the rest of my life. Yay!!"

"Eat your veggies or supplement with fiber. You know - tree bark"

"Free coffee at the contractor check out. No promises as to the freshness. But just like the parking lot, it's hot and black."

"Best composted manure this side of a cows behind."

"Ship a package get a cookie!"