Jen Aprahamian

"Scratch Che's ears, and tell him he's a cougarfacepantherbutt."

"If you leave the building after 6pm, the courtyard exit is the only one that's unlocked."

"Friday nights after 7pm, the second floor is nearly empty -- you can have your choice of equipment!"

"Pro tip: order the slinger with corned beef hash instead of chili."

"The jibaritos...oh my! They're so good that there's a mural of one on the back wall."

"Try the macarons, they're fantastic!"