Johnny Hopkins

"Don't let the LIBERAL MEDIA tell you what to eat"

"P.F. Changs has rats, I found a whole rat in my Cobb salad"

"Don't try and poop in stinky Pete's locker, you'll get in big trouble...learned that the hard way"

"I am now mayor of McAlister's, all who eat here now must submit to my almighty will and bow down before me, as I am ruler of this establishment. That is all."

"Frozen yogurt is single-handedly ruining our country"

"I am now the mayor, you shall all bow before me in fear as I eat my spicy chipotle chicken griller with Mac and cheese"