"Out of consideration for its customers, a restaurant should notify dining patrons if the chef will be leaving early."
"God's comedic Freak-Show!!!"
"A "Redbox" someone said, huh, I thought they were suppose to be pink. Must be some kind of Mall Wart."
"If you don't think God has a sense of humor, then spend a couple of hours here."
"General wholesale merchandise: not open to public"
"Leave a quarter on top of the tank."