"Bring your own soap or ask for some at the front desk upon check-in because there was none when we arrived."
"Upon checking in make sure you are not getting a handicap accessible room if you did not ask for one because the front desk will not warn you."
"You can't get room service for breakfast on any day but Saturday and Sunday. Seriously!!!!!"
"Find the pistachios on the microwave and that will keep the party going."