"Best beer selection in the neighborhood. Even carry 4 import gluten free beers!"
"The soy milk (kikoman) contains gluten (malt). Go for the non-dairy whip cream in your coffee instead!"
"Veggie chili is homemade with lots of tasty veggies -- order it on your nachos!"
"View sucks and the food is overrated, but they do serve a MEAN Grasshopper..."
"Take a turn on the ManThrone and drop a Deuce through the Manhole. The reading ma(n)terial is first rate."
"Second floor vending machine has bags of Munchos for .85...!!!"