Ralph

"Come here and enjoy delicious beers like Budweiser and Coors."

"The chili and cheese nachos will knock your dick off."

"This is actually ComfyTown."

"If you're wondering where all the douchebags went, worry not. They are here."

"Be careful walking around because it's easy to trip over the sticks in everyone's asses."

"It's like walking into a Douche Factory."