"Don't go! Old and dusty... And small. Not worth the money."
"Great food! WIFI-password was cafebistro"
"Try the Melon Mind Smoothie - it's great!"
"Try the steak - best I have had in Thailand ever (but if you don't like it red, make sure to tell the waiter when ordering)."
"Try the duck salad - my absolute favorite."
"Follow the road down and left to find a supermarket - Condis"