"Beware of Dwight and his leather portfolio."
"Any and all personal possessions or property left here after the close of business on 09/24/2010 will be considered abandoned and will escheat to the office. These items will then be auctioned off to"
"Don't get your hopes up: the ice machine is broken. But be sure to make up for it by drinking as much bottled water as possible and pick up a Santa Clause Coke while you are in the area."
"Stay away from this area. It is smelly, messy, and occupied by an ogre. Gross!"
"Try the B.R. Cohn Cab or Ruffino Lumina Pinot Grigiot; they are both really good values!"