"Snicker [something] coffee is breathtakingly delicious. Unfortunately not nomenclature-ally memorable for me. MUST TRY."
"The turkey club is frickin AWESOME. real turkey meat. Not lunch meat. And the fries are the ish."
"Don't ever play pool here. Ever. Dangerous. Like, life threatening. Or something."
"Best place to swim on the East Coast, if not the entire world."