Christopher Petrillo

"Don't come here without a good base-tan if you don't want to look ridiculous."

"Make sure you put the oscars in your iCal before filling up!"

"One of the bedrooms recently doubled in size! (or so it seems)"

"Don't stare at the king tut rug for more than 5 seconds - you'll pass out and wake up in red hook"

"Don't stand too close to Nooka, unless you want to look like a ghost."

"Take a bath - the shower water pressure is weak!"